it’s been awhile.

I have thirty-five drafts currently saved on my blog that are yet to be posted. Why aren’t they posted? To be honest, there isn’t a real excuse. Part of it is that when I’m writing a blog post, my mind sometimes gets overwhelmed with thoughts I’ve had recently and sorting through them, trying to figure out if each one fits into the overall idea that I’m trying to convey is quite exhausting. Another reason is that I’m kind of a perfectionist when it comes to these posts, which is strange in the fact that one of my main reasons for beginning my blog was to provide a platform for myself to expressively write without having to conform to academic rules. However, I have to say, that removing the deadlines that accompany academic writing, you also remove the urgency and sometimes the drive to complete and actually finish work. I’m not surprised but I do have to admit that without deadlines, sometimes work, even if the work is important to us, slips lower and lower on our priority lists as most of our time is taken up by, dare I say it, our day jobs.

I think the last post I published was in May or early June and I am quite upset with myself. Not for any reason other than the fact that I feel as if the only thing stopping me was the lack of mental willpower to commit, at least a portion of my time, to writing. As disappointed as you may be, this post is not going to be about my lack of mental willpower. I could write for pages on that but for one, many people would find that exceedingly boring and for two, I don’t find a purpose in deeply analyzing any negative trait of mine.

My summer has kind of been a whirlwind of activity. I’m currently enjoying a well-needed break, at least until Monday when I move back to campus and the chaos begins again. Without going into too many personal details that would bore you guys to death, I’ll just say that I was challenged by my own mental priority list. My problem was that with different aspects of my life pulling me in different directions, I tried to keep each section separate and happy. This is impossible though if you don’t want to have a breakdown after two weeks. Unfortunately, you don’t gain any more hours of the day based on how much you have to do. Everyone only gets twenty four. We all have to spend a majority of our lives working. We also have our own personal lives that we must push along by doing activities such as laundry and grocery shopping and paying bills. Then there are our social lives, whether it be friends or family, that usually get pushed to the bottom of our priority list when we’re busy. Then there are things you must do to stay alive like eating and sleeping. Believe it or not, those things are important, you need to make them a priority if you want to continue working your ass off. The problem with priority lists is that each section is completely individual. It would be nice if your work called and said. “I noticed you haven’t spent very much time with your family lately, why don’t you take the day off?” But they don’t. Each priority list item just takes what it wants without any regards towards other items on your list. Priorities can run you into the ground if you let them, I learned. Each priority has value, and we forget that. You have to respect and make time for each one, even when it feels like it’s impossible. Don’t sacrifice sleep for work,  because your body can’t handle it and in the end your work will suffer. The more time you allow one item to take, the more the other items will suffer. The more items on your priority list you have, the less time you can commit to each one, so you have to carefully decide which ones make the list at all. What I’ve learned is sometimes you have to say no, which is hard if you’re like me and just making everyone around happy, makes you happy.

Maybe you have to sit down and think about what is important enough to go on your list or maybe you already know and just need to consciously remind yourself. What you have to remember is that choosing to commit time to one things is also choosing to take time away from something else. Don’t take time away from something that is important to you, because it might start to remove itself from your priority list, and it might be something you really liked.

“No amount of security is worth the suffering of a mediocre life chained to a routine that has killed your dreams.”  – Maya Mendoza

 

 

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